{"id":311,"date":"2015-03-06T11:21:39","date_gmt":"2015-03-06T11:21:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/?p=311"},"modified":"2015-03-06T13:15:07","modified_gmt":"2015-03-06T13:15:07","slug":"rejected-sketches-week-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/rejected-sketches-week-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Rejected Sketches: Week 2"},"content":{"rendered":"

More of these then.<\/p>\n

ORANGE WEDNESDAYS<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. INTRO: Business news. After over ten years, Orange have finally ended<\/p>\n

their popular Orange Wednesdays deal that let customers get half<\/p>\n

price cinema tickets. Popular with young Orange users, and<\/p>\n

anyone who knew anyone on Orange, the deal will be missed by<\/p>\n

many. But what\u2019s going to replace it? Well, the company has been<\/p>\n

having internal talks about that already. Here\u2019s what they\u2019ve come<\/p>\n

up with.<\/p>\n

2. BOSS: Right then team. We\u2019re not doing half price cinema tickets<\/p>\n

anymore. But we still need to attract young people. What can we<\/p>\n

offer instead?<\/p>\n

3. EMPLOYEE1: How about half price meat at the butchers? Young people love<\/p>\n

meat!<\/p>\n

4. BOSS: No, we don\u2019t want to offend vegetarians. We need something cool<\/p>\n

and edgy!<\/p>\n

5. EMPLOYEE2: How about knives! They\u2019re cool AND edgy, Half price knives on<\/p>\n

Wednesdays?<\/p>\n

6. BOSS: Hmm, that\u2019s not bad. I love the edginess. But are young people<\/p>\n

really still buying knives?<\/p>\n

7. EMPLOYEE1: Knives are SO 2009. That\u2019s why I\u2019m saying meat! Meat is classic,<\/p>\n

and timeless. Plus people buy meat a lot more often than they buy<\/p>\n

knives!<\/p>\n

8. EMPLOYEE2: Yeah but think about it. How are they going to cut up their meat<\/p>\n

without knives?<\/p>\n

9. EMPLOYEE1: Nobody buys a new knife every time they need to cut up some<\/p>\n

meat!<\/p>\n

10. EMPLOYEE2: Exactly! We\u2019re trying to start a new trend here. Imagine the ads:<\/p>\n

\u201cOrange Wednesdays. Knives for you and a friend. For all your<\/p>\n

meat cutting needs.\u201d<\/p>\n

11. BOSS: Guys, I think we need to stay away from the whole meat and<\/p>\n

cutting angle. It\u2019s not really on-brand.<\/p>\n

12. EMPLOYEE1: Hmmm. How about tofu?<\/p>\n

13. BOSS: Tofu?<\/p>\n

14. EMPLOYEE1: Yeah, it\u2019s like a meat substitute. Plus I think it looks kind of<\/p>\n

Orange. So we can play around with that angle.<\/p>\n

15. EMPLOYEE2: Plus you need knives to eat it!<\/p>\n

16. BOSS: Well, I don\u2019t like it….but I don\u2019t see what other choice we have.<\/p>\n

Get working on those ads right away.<\/p>\n

17. AD VOICEOVER: ORANGE WEDNESDAYS. HALF PRICE MEAT SUBSTITUTES<\/p>\n

AVAILABLE TO ORANGE USERS ONLY ON WEDNESDAYS<\/p>\n

PLUS YOU CAN ALSO BUY KNIVES TOO IF YOU NEED SOME.<\/p>\n

18. BOSS: Ok, everyone is fired.<\/p>\n

19. END<\/p>\n

\n

 <\/p>\n

AD: COLOUR CHANGING TORY<\/strong><\/p>\n

1. V\/O: Is it blue? Or is it purple and yellow? Wow your friends with the<\/p>\n

viral sensation that\u2019s sweeping Westminster \u2013 the colour changing<\/p>\n

Tory!<\/p>\n

Watch with amazement as your constituency MP changes colour<\/p>\n

right before your eyes, and then defects right back again<\/p>\n

afterwards. How does it work? Nobody knows.<\/p>\n

2. TESTIMONIAL: We voted for the local Tory MP thinking he stood for a traditional<\/p>\n

conservative approach to taxation. But then suddenly one day we<\/p>\n

turned on the telly and he going on about immigration and things.<\/p>\n

We still can\u2019t explain it!<\/p>\n

3. V\/O: Colour changing Tories are available in all marginal constituencies<\/p>\n

and tax havens.<\/p>\n

(Warning: May cause racial intolerance and fascist tendencies)<\/p>\n

4. END<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

More of these then. ORANGE WEDNESDAYS 1. INTRO: Business news. After over ten years, Orange have finally ended their popular Orange Wednesdays deal that let customers get half price cinema tickets. Popular with young Orange users, and anyone who knew anyone on Orange, the deal will be missed by many. 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Which is fine. My only noteworthy submission was a sketch about the new Frozen film. It's pretty ambitious, but I can see why it wasn't used. FROZEN 2 1. INTRO: Entertainment news, and Disney has announced plans to produce a sequel\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "writing"","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2226,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/the-mm-characters-whats-going-on-there\/","url_meta":{"origin":311,"position":1},"title":"The M&M characters: what’s going on there?","author":"cookywook","date":"January 23, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"In today's post I'm going to be talking about the M&M characters. But initially, I was going to write a blog post about the crazy cultural landmark that is M&M World. You know, that enormous cathedral of confectionery that dominates Leicester Square opposite The Book of Mormon. 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It\u2019s not like the country\u2019s future as one\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "writing"","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":378,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/some-sketches\/","url_meta":{"origin":311,"position":5},"title":"Some sketches","author":"cookywook","date":"September 11, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"It's Newsjack\u00a0time again. Woo and yay. Basically that means I write things for the Radio that don't get put on the Radio. Here are this week's failures. Apparently\u00a0Font Factor got into the recording at least. It just got the chop in the edit. Boo hoo. FONT FACTOR 1. INTRO Google\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "writing"","block_context":{"text":"writing","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/writing\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/311","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=311"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/311\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=311"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=311"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=311"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}