{"id":772,"date":"2017-01-21T12:09:42","date_gmt":"2017-01-21T12:09:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/?p=772"},"modified":"2017-01-21T12:09:42","modified_gmt":"2017-01-21T12:09:42","slug":"stock-videos","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/stock-videos\/","title":{"rendered":"What&#8217;s the deal with online stock videos?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Let&#8217;s just cut right to the chase: watch <a href=\"http:\/\/www.shutterstock.com\/video\/clip-9306851-stock-footage-an-old-man-with-hypnotic-glasses-witnessing-the-destruction-of-a-world-hiding-his-face-close-up.html?src=search\/O8KTDKfSpzE5A5Nhb5SZCQ:1:8\/3p\">this<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p>What you just watched was a stock video. The title of the video is &#8220;An old man with hypnotic glasses witnessing the destruction of a world, hiding his face. Close-up shot, red background.&#8221; Yes, the last bits are part of the title too, not the description.<\/p>\n<p>The video is eight seconds long. The aspect ratio is 16:9. And you can buy it for \u00a314 in a &#8220;426 X 240 @ 25 fps MOV&#8221; format.<\/p>\n<p>It is also inexplicable.<\/p>\n<p>Now, we all know that stock imagery is a world of madness. Pop over to\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.reddit.com\/r\/wtfstockphotos\/\">\/r\/wtfstockphotos<\/a>\u00a0for an idea. &#8220;Blank-faced man deflates and loses his spine&#8221;, &#8220;Woman licking a cactus&#8221;, and &#8220;Green alien traveler in white desert lunar landscape reading electronic map on future technology flexible display tablet&#8221; are just some of the current highlights. So, WHAT IS THE DEAL?<\/p>\n<p>The business model of stock imagery is fascinating to me. You just take hundreds and hundreds of photos of absolutely anything, in the hope that one day some of them will be useful to someone. You can then make some money from that use.<\/p>\n<p>For instance, &#8220;An old man with hypnotic glasses witnessing the destruction of a world, hiding his face. Close-up shot, red background.&#8221; appears to be part of a video series of similar clips. These include:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>An old man with hypnotic glasses, pre-keyed with pure green, looking at the viewer. Close-up shot, red background.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>An old man with hypnotic glasses, with analogue old CRT TV test card with color bars, full of noise, static, grain, scanlines. He hides his face. Close-up shot, red background.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>An old man with hypnotic glasses, looking like he&#8217;s got bigger funny eyes, hiding his face. Close-up shot, red background.<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>An old man with hypnotic glasses, looking at the viewer. Heavily distorted stylized eyes move into his eyeglasses. Red background.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>There&#8217;s no indication that the &#8216;model&#8217; in the clips is also the person who made them. But that is what I choose to believe. And fair play to him, he&#8217;s providing a public service. For, as the old saying goes,\u00a0<em>it&#8217;s better to have an eight second clip of an old man with hypnotic glasses, with analogue old CRT TV test card with color bars, full of noise, static, grain, scanlines and not need\u00a0an eight second clip of an\u00a0old man with hypnotic glasses, with analogue old CRT TV test card with color bars, full of noise, static, grain, scanlines, than need an eight second clip of an old man with hypnotic glasses, with analogue old CRT TV test card with color bars, full of noise, static, grain, scanlines and not have an eight second clip of an\u00a0old man with hypnotic glasses, with analogue old CRT TV test card with color bars, full of noise, static, grain, scanlines.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p>And there&#8217;s the whole SEO thing. The reason the title is so full of words is that it makes it more likely to come up in search results.<\/p>\n<p>But I just don&#8217;t think anyone will ever want to use any of these videos. They&#8217;re just not very good. And if you really were desperate enough to want one, you&#8217;d probably be able to make one yourself for less than they&#8217;re asking.<\/p>\n<p>So, what&#8217;s the deal with online stock videos? They&#8217;re weird, bad, and basically entirely stupid and useless.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Let&#8217;s just cut right to the chase: watch this. What you just watched was a stock video. The title of the video is &#8220;An old man with hypnotic glasses witnessing the destruction of a world, hiding his face. Close-up shot, red background.&#8221; Yes, the last bits are part of the title too, not the description. 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I've tried poetry, writing, podcasting, photography, and much more. I've even tried the hardest medium of all: video. That's why I have a YouTube channel. With a solid 25 videos. And 439 sorry subscribers. The videos span\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 1 comment","block_context":{"text":"With 1 comment","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/reviewing-all-my-old-youtube-videos\/#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Screenshot-2020-10-31-at-09.53.24-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C476&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Screenshot-2020-10-31-at-09.53.24-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C476&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Screenshot-2020-10-31-at-09.53.24-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C476&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Screenshot-2020-10-31-at-09.53.24-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C476&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/Screenshot-2020-10-31-at-09.53.24-1.jpg?fit=1200%2C476&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2482,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/whats-the-deal-with-these-vigilante-paedophile-hunter-groups\/","url_meta":{"origin":772,"position":1},"title":"What&#8217;s the deal with these vigilante paedophile hunter groups?","author":"cookywook","date":"September 18, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"There's a guy I know on Facebook who shares precisely one type of content. No pictures of themselves or life updates, just the one thing. And that one is thing is footage from vigilante paedophile hunter groups. I didn't even know this was a\u00a0thing\u00a0until they started showing them. But once\u2026","rel":"","context":"With 1 comment","block_context":{"text":"With 1 comment","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/whats-the-deal-with-these-vigilante-paedophile-hunter-groups\/#comments"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/epi.jpeg?fit=1080%2C1020&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/epi.jpeg?fit=1080%2C1020&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/epi.jpeg?fit=1080%2C1020&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/epi.jpeg?fit=1080%2C1020&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/epi.jpeg?fit=1080%2C1020&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1514,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/quick-look-rubik-the-amazing-cube\/","url_meta":{"origin":772,"position":2},"title":"Quick look: Rubik, the Amazing Cube","author":"cookywook","date":"October 6, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"The 80s was a wild time for cartoons, with everything from the Ghostbusters to Mr T\u00a0getting the animated treatment. And it's no secret that a lot of these existed purely to sell or promote child-friendly toys, like Transformers or Masters of the Universe. Even some video games were made into\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;cartoon&quot;","block_context":{"text":"cartoon","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/cartoon\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/10\/21.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":607,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/richards-2016-week-18\/","url_meta":{"origin":772,"position":3},"title":"Richard&#8217;s 2016: Week 18","author":"cookywook","date":"May 7, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"(Read up on what #Richards2016 is all\u00a0about\u00a0here.) Back to usual single-week posting for now. Here we go! April 30th: Honesty Day https:\/\/twitter.com\/cookywook\/status\/726460985813393410 *thought. Yeah, I mean it was\u00a0ok. Spiderman and Ant-Man were great it in. But it did feel like it was all shot in a multi-storey carpark over\u00a0one weekend.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;richard's 2016&quot;","block_context":{"text":"richard's 2016","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/richards-2016\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"316b2532af4f68968ae65e59eadeb046","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/316b2532af4f68968ae65e59eadeb046.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1137,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/this-water-bottle-flip-video-is-a-work-of-art\/","url_meta":{"origin":772,"position":4},"title":"This water bottle flip video is a work of art","author":"cookywook","date":"December 18, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"I wanted to write about something today. But I didn't want to write about Shrek again. So I thought to myself 'what can I write about instead?' What else do I\u00a0know? Then I rewatched a particular video for like the ten thousandth time and realised.... THIS. This is what I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;culture&quot;","block_context":{"text":"culture","link":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/category\/culture\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/12\/Screen-Shot-2017-12-18-at-09.05.27.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1396,"url":"https:\/\/cookywook.co.uk\/blog\/all-star-memes\/","url_meta":{"origin":772,"position":5},"title":"Please enjoy this selection of All Star meme videos","author":"cookywook","date":"June 23, 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"There was a trend early last year of making meme videos around Smash Mouth's 1999 hit \"All Star\". And today I want to revisit some of the best content that came out of that trend. 2018 memes are pretty boring for me. They're standardised to the point of redundancy. 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