(Read up on what #Richards2016 is all about here.)
Yup, twelve whole weeks! Wow. A LITERAL DOZEN. Not like that weird fakey Baker’s Dozen. Like what the HELL bakers, get in line or get out, that’s what I say!
Anyway, on with it.
March 19th: Poultry Day
I’m sure this day is supposed to be all about supporting poultry or whatever. But, in the spirit of this blog, I made it about EATING STUFF INSTEAD YOLO.
Poultry Day! Had a chicken and stuffing sandwich for lunch #richards2016
— Richard Cook 🎂 (@cookywook) March 19, 2016
March 20th: Snowman Burning Day
Almost died for this one.
So yeah I drew a snowman on a post-it and burnt it. IN MY HOUSE OVER MY WOODEN FLOOR WEARING MY CHEAP FLAMMABLE PRIMARK TOUSERS. Pro tip: don’t do any of that.
Thankfully I had a bowl of water on standby and my house didn’t burn down and my fingers were only mildly singed. Yay!
And also, the half-burnt snowman swirling in the bowl at the end is a kind of beautiful metaphor for the end of winter, right? Well, I think it looks cool.
March 21st: World Poetry Day
Wrote some poems and stuff and shared them online.
READ THEM HERE. My favourite one is Growl which I even went to the effort of recording once. Listen to it if you are bored or something.
It has been described in the comments as Incredible! Very larkinesque.
March 22nd: Goof Off Day
I work very hard. So I find it difficult to “goof off”. So I just did it at home instead.
— Richard Cook 🎂 (@cookywook) March 22, 2016
Look at that. Has there ever been a man in a clearer state of goofing off? Let’s inventorise:
- Classic hawaiian ‘party shirt’
- Glass of plonk on the go
- 20 – count them, 20 – brownie bites.
- Double stuff oreo AKA the food of kings AKA the diabetes express AKA the widowmaker AKA my favourite thing to eat and goof off to.
March 23rd: Melba Toast
I don’t really know what Melba Toast is. I was able to buy some and it seems that it’s basically just small ready-made toast. You’re meant to spread classy stuff on it like paté or fish eggs or whatever. NO SUCH LUCK HERE
— Richard Cook 🎂 (@cookywook) March 23, 2016
March 24th: Tuberculosis Day
Short of contacting TB myself, I wasn’t sure what to do. I also have had the BCG jab which is meant to protect against that kind of thing.
So I just sent £10 off to the British Lung Foundation instead. They do good work, and I’d encourage you to consider chucking some wedge at them too.
March 25th: Tolkien Reading Day
Got a free sample of the Fellowship of the Ring off the Kindle store and read it on a train.
— Richard Cook 🎂 (@cookywook) March 25, 2016
It was actually great and reminded me that I’ve never actually finished reading TLoTR. Adding it to my to-read list!
AND THAT’S ALL BABY!!!
Coming up in the next seven days….
- March 26th: Make Up Your Own Holiday Day
- March 27th: Neighbour Day
- March 28th: Black Forest Cake Day
- March 29th: Lemon Chiffon Cake Day
- March 30th: Doctors’ Day
- March 31st: Eiffel Tower Day
- April 1st: International Tuba Day
Erm…. ok. Well, I’m looking forward to all those CAKE days I’m guessing.
Wish me luck xox